They say the hardest thing to do is let go, but I ask is holding on just as hard when the parts continue to fall betwixt your fingers? Pouring your feelings on paper, releasing your soul, every time you think about it, your canvas is complete. I don't want to let go, but I don't want to hold on either. Denial masked in friendship, late night conversing, topped with meaningful/meaningless, "I <3 yous !" What I am trying to say is my heart hides what my mind uncovers, just to tell you it's cool, I'm fine, when at the end of it all I want.....what do I want? For you to be mine? Or your heart? Not tomorrow, not even next week, but a little more kisses, time, effort, hugs, shoulders to lean on, caresses on a bad day. What causes me the most pain also brings me immense joy. A joy I can't scream about on the mountaintops because I can't use my voice. Sign Language. When turning a blind eye no longer works and who you used to be no longer matters. All that's gold actually does glitter, don't be fooled by it's coated shine though, so they tell me.....
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